First, a true parable: A man who was thinking about selling his company paused to reflect on his decision. He was reminded of a friend about the same age who had sold his company three years earlier and had retired at age 42. His friend didn't need more money. So he sailed into what he thought would be the peaceful sea of retirement. Yet, in the months that followed, this friend's life encountered one storm after another and eventually crashed into a rocky shore.

Obviously, the man didn't want to duplicate that outcome. So before selling his company, he did some research. He sought out and talked with 21 people between the ages of 40 and 50 who had sold their companies. Each had cleared in excess of $5 million cash and retired. But 19 of the 21 had divorced within two years, and each was having a significant crisis of meaning.

That ominous story came as no surprise to Bob Buford, author of Halftime and Game Plan (both published by Zondervan). "The lesson I learned is if you don't have work in your box, you'd better put something in your box or mischief will creep in."

A NEW FRONTIER

Your box, according to Buford, is your work life - your time and your attention - and you can fill it with the pursuit of money, ministry or nothing. "I've come to believe that `nothing' is a void - an empty soul, so to speak," said Buford. "It's a soul that may have a belief, but has no activity based on that belief, a soul that builds no muscle or endurance based on that belief. I think that's a very dangerous state."

It's a state in which many people find themselves when they enter "halftime" - that period of restlessness people often call a mid-life crisis. It's a time for decision-making, but many Americans are finding that the rules have changed dramatically since their parents reached this season of life.

"The old pattern was to work for 45 years, retire three years, and die," said Buford. "The new pattern is work 40 years and have a big question mark as to what you'll do for the next 20 to 30 years."

At the turn of the century, the average life expectancy was around 50 years. Middle age was anything over 25. (Gen-Xers might argue that it's still the case, but they would be wrong.) Most Americans can expect to see around 80 years. "A female age 42, if she doesn't die of a heart attack, can expect to see her 92nd birthday," said Buford. The notion of a second adulthood is a brand new idea for this culture. It amounts to an entire adult life that our grandparents didn't have.

The other side of this opportunity has to do with economics. "We are the first generation of people to produce a Michael Dell - a person who, before his 40th birthday, is enormously accomplished and wealthy," said Buford. And it's only a short swivel of the head to see all the Microsoft millionaires, as well as the wider group of people who are not millionaires, but are simply affluent in mid-life.

These demographics and economics add up to a new era - an era in which age and money have expanded in ways that are unprecedented. "It's so new that people have not sorted out what to do with the opportunity," said Buford. Some choose to work until 65 or 75 because they can. Others develop a parallel career path. Some retire, "which is not a healthy idea," said Buford. Others choose a life of service. "These are not the options a person had, say, in the 1920s."

THE SEARCH FOR SIGNIFICANCE

Many people - including those who are not independently wealthy - hunger for greater significance in the second half of their life. They also recognize the capacity they have for doing good beyond their job. After a time, people begin to see how they can stretch beyond their current boundaries.

"A lot of people in their first half careers learn how to lead, scale up, grow and develop human organizations," said Buford. They reach midlife with capacities that can be employed for good works as well as in profit-making activities.

Some prominent examples of such social entrepreneurs:

· Millard Fuller, who was a lawyer in his first half and began Habitat for Humanity as his second half career.

· Chuck Colson, who was a lawyer and in politics in his first half and began Prison Fellowship as an outgrowth of his Watergate experience in his second career.

· Dr. Jim Dobson, who was a child psychologist in his first half and became a writer, radio personality, and, ultimately, a political activist in his second half.

There are many others who aren't nearly as well-known. For example, Dr. Joe McElhaney in Austin, Texas, was an OB/GYN in his first half career. In his second half, he started a medical institute for sexual health. He did it because he saw so many young women who were sexually active earlier in their lives and then unable to have children later, when they had settled down.

And there's Buford, who was Chairman of the Board and CEO of Buford Television, Inc., then founded Leadership Network, a support ministry for pastors and church leaders.

THE NEW RULES

The imagery of halftime is very clear, with a definite first half, a clear break in the action, and then a definite second half. But how people arrive at halftime and how they deal with it varies tremendously.

Since this hasn't happened before in the history of the world, the challenges are new and fresh. So from the feedback he's gotten from his two books, Buford developed "Seven Rules of Halftime":

1. IT'S HARD, NOT EASY. "It wasn't easy to figure out who to marry in the first place. It wasn't easy to raise our children, and it wasn't easy to find a fulfilling occupation. Why we think it will be easy to find a second-half occupation that leads to meaning and significance, I just don't know. Perhaps ministry organizations have convinced us it's easy and quick. For most people, halftime is a journey of years that includes lots of trial and error and disappointment. In other words, it's like the rest of life, not different, and there is no free lunch."

2. DON'T LEAVE THE BOX EMPTY. "There are perils of an empty soul. Those were made apparent in the story of the 19 people who got divorces. The Bible teaches that evil can be held at bay, but it's never completely destroyed. Science teaches that nature abhors a vacuum and a vacuum tends to suck in all kinds of things. Some of those things are not healthy. It's very important that, if people don't fill their lives with the structure that work gives, that they do fill their lives with something else rich, intense, challenging and meaningful."

3. YOU START WITH YOURSELF. "Here's an acronym developed by Rick Warren (pastor of Saddleback Valley Community Church in California): SHAPE. S = Spiritual gifts. H = Heart. A = Abilities. P = Personality. E = Experience - your resumé. The set of experiences you've had. In particular, the difficult or painful experiences.

"Every single human being is shaped differently. If I've learned one lesson from Peter Drucker, it's that you need to build on strengths. You need to discover what you've done particularly well. Usually you know by the end of your first half. You don't know that going into the first half. The other thing I've learned is to focus on what you care about."

4. YOU TEST YOUR WAY IN. "You wade in, you don't dive. In my case, I ran a parallel career for seven or eight years to really find out what the ministry world was like. Not simply as a student, but fully engaged. I had a foot on each bank. There are different ways of doing that - being a donor or being a board member. In Game Plan, there are eight pathways from success to significance. Those eight are the ways you test your way in."

5. YOU NEED A STRONG ALTERNATIVE VISION. "Don't just go away from something, be drawn toward something. This is a reason to try a variety of things - to see what draws you."

6. YOU CAN'T DO IT ALONE. "People do their first half work in teams, and they tend to do philanthropy and second half work alone. We're designed to be interdependent with other people."

7. PULL THE TRIGGER. "God can't steer a parked car. Get started and then discover along the way what it is that God would have you do."

Despite the challenges of this new frontier, Buford always comes back to that last piece of advice. Every believer experiences one conversion - the acceptance of Christ as who He said He is. But Buford sees a second conversion experience - the conversion of faith to works. This conversion is not the salvation experience, but it can be a natural extension of one's faith in Christ. So, he says over and over, pull the trigger on that second conversion.

"The success-to-significance transition is really what Saint Paul describes in I Corinthians 13, which is faith which leads to hope which, hopefully, leads to work, charity and love," Buford said. "To me, the (Biblical) conception of love is not a superficial emotion, but it's more volitional than that. It's more a matter of engaging the will and serving other people. And the second half is a great time to do that - to make the second conversion." 

“Building a Game Plan.” Life@Work Vol. 1, No. 3 - Calling August 1998. Written by Kirk Livingston who owns St. Paul-based Livingston Communication, a marketing communication firm. Used by Permission. lifeatwork.com    Content distributed by WorkLife.org > Used for non-profit teaching purposes only.